Just about every other idea I had come up with was met with an encouraging OK. But this time I heard WHY?? Why do you want to go to a sex club?? And it wasn’t just a curious why either. It was a defensive why – a WHAT THE FUCK kind of why!!!!
Good thing I did my homework! I mentioned that when I read about the sex club in my book, I did not know what swinging was. So my motivation was not about sex with other people, but rather adding another erotic element to the sex we were having with each other. But once I read about swinging, I did become curious. The major pros were – adding hotness to an already hot relationship, and being in an environment with like-minded, non-judgmental people. Major cons were – possible damage to the relationship, and the risk of disease. Once Sexy Hubby understood that my motivation was about enhancing our sex life, and making friends, he agreed that the club would be worth checking out.
One thing that is worth noting here is that Sexy Hubby and I had NEVER gone to any sort of club before. We met in college, were both athletes with conflicting schedules, got married, and had kids. There was no nightclub scene for us!! We worked, parented, ran a household…… hmmmmm – not a lot of grown up fun…. no wonder things got stale!! (Note to self: tell my kids to have balance in their lives and make special time for their significant others.)
In my typical GO BIG OR GO HOME fashion – our first clubbing experience was going to be at a sex club!
I was sooooooo nervous!!! This was a DEFINITE travel outside my comfort zone! But I was also excited! Sexy Hubby and I agreed that making friends was important and as far as swinging was concerned – we didn’t have an opinion either way. We were just going to be “open to the possibilities”.
The evening finally arrived and we got to the club early for the tour that was available prior to the club officially opening for the evening. A very nice normal looking woman (Ha!!) took us through the facility showing us the amenities of the club and reviewing the rules. At first glance things seemed pretty normal. A dance floor, a bar, buffet area, eating area… nothing too unusual yet.
Then we were shown a couples lounge – a space with 6 beds and a couch all sharing a common area! Then we passed the showers and lockers. There were two large showers that would easily accommodate more than two people! From there we were shown a series of individual rooms. Each room had a king size bed with a plastic cover. Clean sheets and condoms were provided. And it was explained that after a room was used, the occupants put their dirty linens in a hamper, and club staff would then wipe the plastic cover down, put down a clean bottom sheet and two condoms.
The etiquette of open doors versus closed doors, and open curtains versus closed curtains was explained. An open door signaled that others could ask to join, and an open curtain was an invitation to watch. Yes – my head was spinning a little bit!!! Next we ventured upstairs and were introduced to the ORGY BAR – oh my!! The orgy bar was two king mattresses pushed together surrounded by a bar and barstools!!! In addition to this was another group of private rooms including one with a sex swing in it. Our tour guide also went over rules. Obviously no cell phones! Ask before you touch. No means no. No nudity in the buffet area. We got back to the lobby, filled out paperwork, signed up for a 3 month membership, and re-entered the now open club.
Suffice it to say, our experience did not meet our expectations AT ALL. No one talked to us, and other than having sex with each other in a private room with the door and curtain SHUT – it was a pretty so-so evening.
Significant Event Number 10: I did not want to make a decision about this experience based on one visit!
We got home from our new experience and discussed the evening. The lack of social interaction was a bummer, but our nervousness probably didn’t help the situation. I let Sexy Hubby know I wanted to go again. On the positive side, the food was really good – a full dinner AND breakfast buffet were provided. And, the DJ dancing was a lot of fun too. The staff was very friendly as well. We also saw that the people who go to sex clubs – at least this one – were just regular folk! That was reassuring to us since we had no idea what to expect!
We went back the following weekend and this time things were different!!!
To be continued…
(This post was first published November 18, 2012. I have unpublished all posts relating to “the story” and am revising them with the benefit of 5 additional year of hindsight.)